coolcatgroup:

YOU’VE BEEN HIT BY

YOU’VE BEEN STRUCK BY

A SMOOTH CRIMINAL

happymoomin:

officialunitedstates:

officialunitedstates:

officialunitedstates:

me, giving the Corporate Technocracy my dna: i need to know what percentage greek i am or i cannot live anohter day

me, spitting into a tube: tell me what brand my chromosomes are and also definitely dont keep this on file for when i commit future crimes please

me at the drive thru: can I get a medium spaghetti

the worker: please spit into the DNA tube so i can verify you’re at least 4% italiano

shroom-boi:

if kirk and spock hadn’t fucked in the sands of vulcan we would have to manually open the doors every time we go to the store

watsonshoneybee:

the thing about everything is that it all gets easier with practice, so be careful what you practice 

liepard:

i genuinely do not think dogs, the loving goofballs that they are, would approve of people mercilessly shitting on cats for no reason other than the fact that they are not Dogs… you guys have learned nothing from the carefree teachings of the dog… they don’t want to be used to fuel your unwarranted hatred… what would your dog say… smh!

thehighwayphantom:

cornfield-cryptid:

cruzfucker69:

the walking dead, game of thrones, and breaking bad were just superwholock for men

Game of Walking Bad